Væsner. Episode 5: A Call + Episode 6: The Gatekeepers’ Union


A Call

Posted on July 29, 2016

“Hi, yes, my name is Anne Nielsen. I’m calling because I’ve just got back after having been out of town for about a week, and I can see that I’ve got a letter from you. Or I’ve got a letter. Which might be from you. Well, it’s from a union, anyway. Can you perhaps check if you’ve sent me any letters recently? No, I’m not a member, that’s what the letter’s about – that I need to re-register with the Union, quick? … Yeah, well, that’s the thing – it says Gatekeeper’s Union, but you’re the only union I’ve ever been a member of, so I thought that perhaps it was a sub-division or … No? Okay, alright. Do you know about any Gatekeepers’ Unions? Alright, okay, thanks anyway.”

“By the way, is it stormy where you are just now …?”



The Gatekeepers’ Union

I’ve received a letter from the Union. Not the Union I used to be a member of – I know, because I phoned them – but the Gatekeepers’ Union. It says:

Dear Gatekeeper 75803002,

You have recently been contacted by Copenhagen Gate Services concerning the reopening of the Gate of Amager. Before returning to your duties, we strongly recommend that you renew your membership of the Gatekeepers’ Union. In these times of crisis, the Inter-D roads in general & the inroads & outroads of Copenhagen & its harbours in particular are under much pressure. This means that the tasks of Gatekeepers continue to expand & we do our utmost to make sure that you can perform your duties with little to no risks to health, life and sanity.

Enclosed is a membership-application form and a return envelope. Please fill out & send us your membership-application as soon as possible.

If you have any questions, please do not hesitate to contact me.

With the best intentions,

T. Pultervold


The Gatekeepers’ Union

Printing press number: 75- 04380- 37285899659-0 – Toben Pultervold – 9

I don’t know what a ‘printing press number’ is, and the address on the return envelope makes little sense:

Understreet, Belowwater

hush, hush

say it again

Att. T. Pultervold

No idea.



We bring episodes of the blog-series Væsner every week. For previous episodes, follow the tag ‘væsner’. Join the Monster Network on Facebook or follow us on Twitter for updates.

‘Væsner’ is written by Anne Nielsen. You can follow the True & Accurate Accounts of her experiences with Copenhagen Gate Services, strange weather and dancing shadows on her blog and on Twitter.